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02 May 2005 @ 07:12 pm
When I showed my new present to Jax, I didn't think he'd ever been happier to see me. Sitting in the darkened corner of Jurassic, I lit up a cigarette and smiled as he stammered and asked me where I had managed to get smack that good. Where I had managed to get the money for it. He should know better than that, when we got too hard up I was always the girl who ended up doing something depraved to get us what we needed. I might be a real beast, but I still cared for my friends. Especially friends that could play instruments the way my bandmates could. Sure, Static was a piece of shit sometimes but he was the best drummer in New York, not to mention a really fucking fabulous piece of ass when I needed it. He didn't have vampire stamina that came in handy when you were fucking on the hood of a car, but who did really? Besides my new sugar daddy.

After I'd had a few drinks, I could feel my buzz starting to wear off. This was the part that I liked least. The crash that inevitably came after a night of solid partying. When I had the means I'd generally pop a Xanax and sleep for a few hours. Sleep off the crash that sometimes made your head want to explode. Then there were the times when I couldn't sleep at all, and I'd stay up for days alternating between writing songs and flying off into a rage at the drop of a hat. Usually I could keep the rage in check, because there was no need for it. All these humans like Jax and Static, wondering around through the city limits. From Manhattan to the Bronx they were all the same, filled with so much anger and doubt. That wasn't the life I was leading, not since Thornley had sunk his teeth into my flesh that one night at the trailer park I used to call home. He changed me forever, made me thing of primal beauty. He called it fate, and I taunted him with his own words when I ended up killing him. Of course, he couldn't hear me at the time of his death. It didn't work that way. Tonight wasn't a Xanax night, tonight was a night to party until the sun rose up over the city.

"What are you doing tomorrow?" I asked Jax, leaning over the table and smiling at him.

He shrugged at me in response. "I dunno. Thought I might go down to Central Park, see if I can panhandle a little bank off the tourists. But besides that? There's that party tomorrow night at Cassie's place."

"That bitch?" I asked, sitting back in my chair. Cassie's parents were millionaires, but she refused to live on the Upper East Side with the rest of her kind. Instead she preffered slumming it in a gigantic artsy loft in The Village. Cassie was a supporter of Shy, but she sang for her own band, Wasted Fairy. They weren't too bad, sort of a distorted hollow sound. They weren't as good as Shy, and it ate her up inside because her vocals would never be like mine. Sometimes I wanted to pat her and smile and let her in on my little secret. Thrall, baby.

"I know, she is a bitch. But we really should make an appearance or else we can say bye to all those funds that Shy gets. Personally? I'd love a new bass." Jax said, giving me a look like he was desperately trying to not piss me off. After all, I was the one who was holding tonight.

"Are you saying that because you want a new bass or because you like fucking her too much to not go to her party?" A delicious little smirk crossed my face as I saw the shocked look flicker across his face. Did he really think he could keep that secret? I could smell her all over him when he came home some nights. "Forget it, Sugar. Let's go get high." Giving him a wink I stood up and headed for the door of the bar with him right behind me.

"You know Static's gonna be pissed that we didn't wait for him." He pointed out as we walked across the street to our apartment.

"I know."

I had no idea what it was cut with, but the heroin Angelus had given me was the finest fucking drugs I'd had in a really long time. By the end of the night, Jax and I had eaten virtually everything in our kitchen and then started jamming out in the basement, the amps cranked so loudly I was sure the entire neighborhood would stage a riot. For hours on end he played and I sang before we both went upstairs to our respective rooms and slept off the crash. If the crash was anything like the high I knew I was going to come down hard and fast.

When I woke up the next morning afternoon, Static had already left and hadn't told anyone where he was going. Just that he would meet us at Cassie's house later on. It didn't make much difference to me, and I spent most of my afternoon with my fingers pressed into the dewy grass in Central Park. Letting the sun beat down on me, I watched Jax try to work his charms on the wealthy tourists that passed us by. Panhandling wasn't exactly a respectable way to make ends meet, but neither was selling your blood to hungry vampires. Of course, selling your blood was a whole lot more profitable.

"Sixty three dollars. Not to bad for a day of hanging out in the park, huh?" He asked me with a grin as the sun started to set and we headed to the subway.

"Not too bad at all." I said with an impish smile, thinking of the five hundred I had made in a half hour's time.

A few hours later I was in Cassie's apartment. One thing could be said for the bitch, her parties were full of free booze and drugs. You couldn't turn that down, but mostly it was filled with local bands and groupies hoping that we would get drunk and pick up instruments like some of us inevitably did by the end of the night. An impromptu concert in the making. I, however, wasn't in the mood. Jax had already seperated himself from me and was hanging all over Cassie. I hoped she was at least a good fuck to have his rapt attention the way that she did. I still hadn't seen Static all night, and I idly wondered what he was up to.

Holding a beer in one hand and my lit cigarette in the other, I felt him the minute he walked in the door. It wasn't Static, I could give a shit less about him coming to the party or not and I knew I wouldn't feel it if he did. No. Angelus was here, and I had to wonder why. Tilting my head slightly to the right I locked my gaze onto his across the room of crowded people.
 
 
It had been over a week, maybe even two, didn't know really. Hadn't bothered going back to that divey place, that room, that chair. Chair where I drank the most powerful blood I had in a long time, as much as I wanted to go back to that chair? I couldn't let her think she had the control, the power. She did though, that's what set her aside from the rest of the gutter snipes. It swelled off from her with every intake of breath, every confident step and sway of her hips. I strolled along the street, nonchalantly looking around for a quick snag and drain job, something simple. Easy. Dumb blonde or maybe a saucy brunette that would fight and then give in like they always did. I stopped just outside of a club, tipping my head curiously as a familiar smell filled my senses. I glanced around in a bit of confusion, this was the worst part of town, what the hell- right, I didn't miss the whole white trash style clothing she had on. Wouldn't surprise me at all to find her in this part of town, it was hard and fast and evil. Exactly what she was. What I am.

I made my way through the door, smoke assaulting me as soon as the door sucked open, hiding everything in a pale veil of blue and red as the lights stroked across the room. I found a small booth and sat down in it quietly, never raising the attention of anything in the bar. I was as hidden as the smoke, I was the smoke. My eyes scanned the area, a slight tapping of drumsticks brought my attention back to the stage. I could feel her energy everywhere but couldn't see her, either that or I was in a club of werewolves which wouldn't be very likely. Werewolves were not a large striving community in the United States, now if we were in Poland? I'd be rethinking that thought real fast. The crowd started to emit wolf whistles and a few guys shouted out a few vulgar words, and then? The spotlight struck. There she was. I tipped my head curiously as her mouth opened and low husky tones belted across the bar, filling everywhere it could reach, invading the smallest of spaces and demanding attention be paid. She has such presence, it was absolutely amazing. I wondered what the hell she was doing wasting her time in this place though, werewolf like her? She should be running her own little pack, I'd guess that any male werewolf would kill to be mated with her.

"Excuse me, would you like a drink?" A nosey little cocktail waitress interupted my train of thought, asking me if I wanted liquor. I had half the nerve to break her neck, but not here. Too small a space and I really didn't have the energy to direct my attention to kill the entire lot of them in here. I reached up and gripped the collar of her shirt, pulling her face close to mine with a sweet smile. She went wide eyed for a moment and then relaxed at my smile on my face, smacked her gum a little louder like the obnoxious fuck she was.

"I'll let you know when I need... refreshing." I said in a low voice, letting go of her collar and watching as she winked and disappeared into the crowd with her little tray perched on her hand above her head. I let my eyes wander back to the stage, drinking in the lovely sight that was coaxing the crowd in with her voice. Her energy, they didn't even know it. She could massacre the whole bunch before they knew what was going on, she was thrall at it's finest.
 
 
Current Mood: enthralled
 
 
03 April 2005 @ 06:03 am
"What're ya havin' tonight, Ru?" The bartenders ragged voice caught my attention as I turned my head fluidly from the crowd of people who were leaving The Lounge. Usual Saturday night scene, low lifes and smackheads along with your local population of fellow musicians coming out to see Shy play like we did every weekend.

We watched the sunset for the last time.

"Whatever you're buying, Eddie." I turned the full force of my most wolfish smile on the aging bartender who spent most weekends trying to get a full look at my cleavage without my noticing. He just didn't know what lurked inside, I could smell the desire on him.

Dead angels fell from grace, departing into nothingness.

"Is it just me or were we dead on tonight?" Another familiar voice caught my attention as I turned away from Eddie, who was busy pouring my drinks and to Static. Static was my drummer and on occasion my latest fuckbuddy.

"It was a good night." I retorted in a passionless voice as Eddie set down my usual drink on the bar. One free drink per show, thanks to the bartender who was desperately trying to get into my pants. This reoccuring gig at The Lounge was not without it's benefits.

Darkness embraced us with new life, and death began to form.

"Are you holding?" I asked Static finally when Eddie was out of earshot. He was busy talking to Ronnie the bouncer, and I was glad for the distraction.

"You know I am, but Ru, I gotta tell you. I need rent from you. We're gonna get evicted if we don't pay up by next week."

A low growl erupted from my throat as I drowned the glass of Jack and Coke that still sat on the bar. Rent. The thought of it almost made me want to visit our slumlord landlord in his Manhattan apartment on a full moon night. The wolf didn't need to pay rent, it just needed to be let out to roam free. This pretty face was nothing more than another mask I was forced to wear for most of the month. The days in between full moons were long and exhausting and a good healthy dose of smack usually kept me frown tearing off all of my skin so I wouldn't have to hide anymore.

We will forever stand eternal, as the dark gods we are.

"I'll get it. Don't worry. It'll be in your cute little hand come tomorrow morning." I smiled slightly and disarmingly at Static as he nodded at me and lit up a cigarette before offering me one. Lazily I pulled a Marlboro from his pack and lit it up.

Getting money was easier than it should be most of the time. I knew of this place, the closest thing to selling your body without actually selling it. The creatures that frequented those dives were after more than sex. They wanted blood and I had plenty of it. Werewolf blood was a rare specialty for the vampire types and some paid well for it. It was easier then selling my soul, and I was almost sure I'd sold that long ago. My body? I was more than willing to give that away for free.

The downside was I had to go in clean or else nothing would touch me. It looked like the party wasn't gonna start for me until after I got back to my dingy little apartment in the Village much later in the night. It was still early, barely even midnight and the night was young. New York City was such a wretched place to spend a whole night in. When the moon hung low in the sky and darkness fell over the city. That? That was when it finally came alive. Everything sang so much louder when night fell.

Unite us, adore us.

Butting out the end of my cigarette in the ashtray I winked at Eddie before hopping off of the barstool. I had business to take care of tonight and Static and his...needs would just have to wait. I had needs to. Needed to escape these four walls and roam through the city. I did that on most nights but tonight I had a specific destination in mind.

"Bye babe." I tilted my head at Static as I pulled my jacket on. "See you at home later."

With that I turned on my heels and headed out into the darkened city streets. Passing panhandlers, drug dealers and prostitutes I could feel the power of the night calling to me. Sometimes I wondered if there were others in this city like me. I would walk by someone on the street and smell them and I would instantly snap to attention. I longed to follow them, to consume and claim them, but something always held me back.

We are the only ones for you.

The night was chilly with a slight autumn breeze but the blood was pumping hot through my veins as I walked into one of the abandoned warehouses on the upper East side. Some nights I got so desperate I would head over to the whorehouses in Chinatown but tonight? I needed a big payoff and I knew Manhattan had the richest vampires. Maybe even one with a little kink for werewolf blood. Just had to promise not to bite back, and vaguely I wondered if that would even effect a vampire.

Walking into the main lounge I saw a few vampires nestled up close with girls. Some of them were by themselves, snoozing away in different corners of the room. The few conscious ones perked instantly as soon as I walked into the room. They could smell what I was, what I could give them. There was something else in this building, I could smell power. So thick it almost drowned me in dizzyness, and another low growl threatened to escape from my throat. Walking slowly and deliberately past the vampires in the lounge I wandered down the hallway until I found the source. Tilting my head coyly to the side, I spotted the vampire that I had been looking for all night. The one with the most power.

"I'm what you're looking for tonight." I said confidently, as I leaned into the doorway and tilted my neck to the side.

Burn together with our sleeping souls